How do you make a Tork laugh on Saturday?
Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

Why did the Tork stare at an orange juice can for 2 hours?
Because it said 'concentrate'.

How do you keep a Tork busy forever?
Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.

Why can't Tork make ice cubes?
They always forget the recipe.

How did the Tork try to kill the bird?
He threw it off a cliff.

Why did 18 Tork go to a movie?
Because "below 18" was not allowed !!!

What do you call a Tork in an institution of higher learning?
A visitor.

A Tork ordered an extra large pizza. The clerk asked if he should cut it in 6 or 12 pieces.
"Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."

Tork #1: "Have you ever read Shakespeare?
Tork #2: "No, who wrote it?"

What about the Tork's wife who gave birth to twins?
Her husband is out looking for the other man.

Tork: "Excuse me sir, what time is it?
MAN: "It's 3:15."
Tork: (puzzled look on his face) "You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."